How do I know if my attorney is doing a good job or not?

I know it sounds like a silly question, but after our last appearance in family court I am having my doubts. My ex filed a restraining order on Jan. 4th 2011. My attorney and I appeared at the hearing on Jan. 28th. He also served my ex with paperwork for a child custody case at that time. The judge referred the case to family court and did not decide on the restraining order at that time. He also gave me monitored visits with my son every Friday at that time. We appeared for the child custody case on April 22 2011. My ex made allegations that I abused her and our son, but provided no proof only her testimony. There has never been any arrests or charges brought up against me. She never even called the police during our eight years together. The judge listened to her testimony and then asked me some questions and decided to keep the restraining order for one year. She and I can only communicate if it regards our son and we can only come with in 100 yards of each other if it is for drop of or pick up. There was no crime committed. The judge then gave me unsupervised visits with our son three times a week, every first, third and fifth week of the month. They scheduled another hearing seven weeks later and ordered both myself and my ex to attend parenting classes. This past Tuesday we had another hearing and the judge asked how the visits were going and we both said "fine". I asked to change the visits to the weekends because of my new job and he did. Then my ex made up more allegations that my nine year old nephew has sexually abused our son during my visits. It is impossible because he never left my sight. The judge ordered that our son not be taken around his nephew until Department of childrens' social services looks in to the matter. He then scheduled another hearing in August. Our son is now in counseling and the social worker said she will do a home interview and decide if an investigation needs to take place. My attorney keeps reassuring me that she needs burden of proof. That she needs to prove I am abusive or that my nephew has abused our son. She is blatantly lieing in court! My attorney we do not need to defend because she has to prove, but he doesn't do much in court. Thee is a restraining and no crime committed. I still do not get to have over nights with my son and am limited to three four hour visits every other week. I have no criminal record. I am a recent college graduate. I have a good job and am enrolled in graduate school. I have been there every day for our son since he was born until his mother kicked me out. I have talked to people who get to see their children every other weekend and have weekly visits. Their children get to stay the night. Their children get to have a relationship with their fathers. And these people have felonies on their record and live with their parents. Am I being too impatient? Is my attorney doing his job? Why is this taking so long? It should be simple. We broke up. Neither of us are criminals. Neither of us have done anything wrong. Why can't the court just decide on custody, visitation and support and let us move on with our lives? Is it my ex's allegations that are holding this up? Or what?